Bonnie Fuller: Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Prove Marrying for the Wrong Reasons Is a Recipe for Divorce

Marriage is NOT a fairy tale, Katie Holmes. Just because you have crushed on someone since you were a teenager doesn't mean you should marry them when they're a devoted Scientologist and you're not.

Katie Holmes - when you filed for divorce from Tom Cruise you just became another real-life example of whatnot to do when choosing a life mate.

Tom Cruise may have been -- and still is -- a handsome, rich superstar and a gorgeous guy who starred in yourTop Gun bedroom poster, but you and all the women out there have to marry the real man and not a fictionalized man of your dreams.

As dull as it sounds, it is totally true that you must marry a man who shares your same life goals and values, and the two of you have to have common interests that you both enjoy.

That doesn't mean that you have to come from the same ethnic background, have the same skin color, or even be a member of the same religion. Lots of people have happy, successful and long-term marriages even if their backgrounds are diverse.

But, you have to be on the same page when it comes to the most important guiding principles of your life.

And Katie, in this case, the man you married was a very devoted member of an extremely demanding and possessive religion -- Scientology. And Scientology has some very strange beliefs. So much so that many people are convinced that it's a cult.

On the other hand, you Katie are a Catholic, raised by parents who are devoted Catholics.

There was no way when you finally realized that you couldn't become a fervent Scientologist devotee or have your daughter become indoctrinated into Scientology, that your marriage could last.

You should have paid attention to Nicole Kidman's marital experience with Tom. Not only did their union end up in a nasty divorce but it appears that Nicole basically lost the two children she adopted with Tom. Tom got custody and her two kids also became devoted Scientologists -- and she is now rarely seen with them.

You never should have rushed into marriage and motherhood; getting engaged after two months of dating and then pregnant shortly after that.

So Hollywoodlifers, learn from Katie Holmes' mistake. No matter how glamorous, sexy and powerful a man may seem, he's not Mr. Right unless you and he see eye-to-eye on how you want to live, where you want to live, whether you want to have children, how you want to raise them, whether you will be a two or one-career marriage and more.

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